Confession

I admit. It’s my obsession that has resulted in my own agony today. I should have, should have long gotten over you.

But, apparently I just can’t. Sometimes, I’m all well without asking for much of you. But, sometimes, I needed so much of you. I swear, every time I succumbed to you, I tried holding back. It just never worked. I admit, I am not sure, if it really doesn’t work or perhaps, I don’t wish it works. Somehow, I allowed it to happen; I indulged in the short term happiness we shared. Over and over again.

I am full of regrets at every aftermath. But I can’t help thinking about you, everything about the many aspects of you. And I’ll eventually turn to you. I enjoyed having you, I seriously do. But it always has to come with a heavy price to pay. I just don’t have the fortune and privilege to enjoy you like the way other people are with theirs.

Please, we can never be like before anymore. I never want to be like before anymore. So please don’t come back into my mind again. These two weeks are enough. A part of me hates myself so much. I resent myself for all my cravings, cravings for you- the food that makes me fat. 2kg is enough. I'm gonna get you out of me, and I’m gonna break away from you from today onwards. I’ll never want to be fat again...